a new parenting strategy

If you are anything like me and your household is at all like mine, then you struggle with getting your kids to stay on top of their daily chores and with limiting the amount of 'screen time' they have.  I was surfing around FB tonight {using some of my well-earned screen time :) } and found this blog post:

I can not wait to print out our chore and tech tickets and give them a whirl!  Do you have any great strategies for keeping your kids on track?  I'd love to hear them - please feel free to share in the comments!

Where do I begin?

So this is what my right foot looks like on the inside right now...  

Apparently it doesn't look quite the way it should, and I am now scheduled for foot surgery in about a month.  You see, I slipped and fell while walking into  church on the very snowy morning of January 29 this year.  I thought I had sprained or broken my ankle. A quick trip to the ER and some x-rays later said, no break, just a sprain, stay off from it for a while and it should feel better.  Follow up with your primary care doctor.  Ok, so I did that, and it did feel a little better but it was still VERY black and blue in my arch and still VERY swollen.  My foot was swollen by my toes, not my ankle, so my primary doc ordered a second set of x-rays - this time of my foot instead of my ankle - to make sure nothing was broken.  She confirmed, no breaks, just a sprain. Give it time.  Weeks go by and it's not really improving so I made an appointment with an orthopaedic surgeon that specializes in foot issues.  He orders a third set of x-rays - this time standing (because I can finally do that again!) and notices that there is a space between a couple of the TMT joint bones that should be there.  RED FLAG!  I learn at this point that I have a "lisfranc injury" or mid foot sprain and have torn the ligaments that run across the top of my foot.  He orders a set of snazzy new orthotic insoles for my shoes and some compression stockings and we cross our fingers and pray that this helps things get better.  Six weeks later (we are now at May 21st) I go in for a follow up appointment.  It still hurts.  It's still swollen although the bruising has long since faded away.  And there is now a large bump on the inside of my foot.  I learn at this appointment that the bump is scar tissue forming where the ligament has been torn.  A fourth set of x-rays then confirm that arthritis is forming in my foot and his recommendation is that I schedule a surgery to repair the damage before it gets worse than it already is.  

Hmmm...

So now I'm scheduled to have a "1st, 2nd, and 3rd TMT fusion with gastroc recession" on June 29.  In other words, they are going to uses screws and possibly cadaver bone to fuse 3 of the bones in the top of my foot together.  They also plan to (although it might not be necessary) lengthen my calf muscle.  After 5 months of dealing with this injury I'm going to willingly submit myself to another 1.5 years of recovery to hopefully get it back to good after surgery.  No weight at all on it for 2 months.  (Goodbye summer!) and then a long road of physical therapy and rebuilding strength and flexibility in my foot and leg.  Hopefully the screws that they put in during the surgery don't irritate the other tendons/muscles in my foot too much, or there will be a 2nd surgery to remove them after they've done their job.  Doctor said that at 6 months post surgery it should be about 80% better and the last 20% will come in the next year.  

If all of that wasn't overwhelming enough, I'm also in the process of getting divorced.  And my house was listed on the mls with my realtor last week.  And it's the end of the school year, so we have spring programs, and graduation ceremonies, and dance recitals, and piano recitals, and the list goes on and on.  And I had a garage sale here for 3 days last week.  So my garage is still a mess and so is my house.

I'm starting to feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water.  I need to keep reminding myself that while all of this is pretty crummy stuff and it really sucks to have to deal with it all at the same time, it could be so much worse.  I don't have a terminal disease - I have a sore foot that needs surgery.  Will it be uncomfortable, yes, but it's not chemo or radiation.  I'm not going to lose my hair and feel sick.  My foot is going to hurt.  And my house is for sale.  At least I have a house to sell.  And it's not upside down on the mortgage - so it's not a short sale or facing foreclosure.  It's a nice house.  I should be able to find a buyer. And I'm getting divorced.  Ok.  This one is harder to spin positive, but I can do it.  I'm not bickering constantly with my soon to be ex-husband.  We actually still get along pretty well.  We're just not very good at being married.  Our kids know that we both still love them very very much and that this has nothing at all to do with them.  They aren't in any danger.  He's not going to try to run off with them while I'm stuck here with my foot in a boot.  It's not the way I saw my life going, but it's going to be ok.

I'm going to tear a page right out of Ashley Hackshaw's (Lil Blue Boo) story and claim it for myself.  I'm going to CHOOSE JOY through all of this.  It's kind of been my mantra since things started happening with the divorce, and now its just even that much more important for me to remember and practice daily!  

God has a lesson for me in all of this.  I'm sure of it.  I'm just not sure what it is right now.  Maybe to slow down?  Maybe to learn to ask for help?  Maybe to realize once and for all that I'm not really as in control of my life as I like to think I am?  One thing I've already learned for sure is that there is no way I'm going to be able to handle any of this without Him.  

"I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength." - Philippians 4:13

looking for my motivation...

have you seen it?


I have a crazy long list of things to do right now and absolutely no motivation to do them.  It's kind of where you have so much to do that you don't know where to start so your kind of frozen.   That's where I am.  Frozen.

I am having a garage sale in a few weeks and I need to get ready for it.  I'm also trying to get the house ready to put on the market.  And look for houses that would work for me.  And do all of the stuff that spring time with kids requires - sports, recitals, spring programs, teacher appreciation, etc...  I'll manage it all.  I always do.  But I would really like to not feel so stressed while I'm doing it.

I'm trusting that God has a plan for all of this, and that it will all fall into place the way it should.  But that in and of itself is a stressful thing for me.  I'm a planner.  I like to know what's coming and what to expect.  And that is not a luxury I have right now. 

Keep praying for me and let me know if you have any great motivation techniques.

listening for God

So my oldest daughter asked me the other day if I had ever heard God's voice.  Nothing like a "little" question for a quick car ride, right?!  She had been learning about prayer and listening for God to speak to you and she was worried because she had never heard Him like she could hear me talking to her.  So... we had a great little conversation about the ways that God speaks to you.  A little voice in your head, a feeling, someone (a real person) saying something to you, a song, a sign, etc...  That conversation along with the plethora of things that have been on my mind and in my prayers lately have me listening for God more so than I might usually do {hey, I'm being honest here!}.


Today I was driving around looking at some potential neighborhoods and I had the radio on to our local christian radio station.  As I'm driving, I realize that I have started singing along and the lyrics are "I'm not where I'm supposed to be..."  hmmm....  Not the exact context of the song, but the line I noticed that I was singing.  So, I smiled to myself and turned out of the neighborhood to head home.  The song transitioned into the next one, and the new lyric that I was singing turned into "rise up, rise up..."  as I'm driving up a crazy huge hill to get out of the area that I was in and head back towards my part of town.  hmmm....


I'm not always the best at hearing God.  I'm certainly better at speaking than at listening.  But from time to time God gives me the "neon sign" that I'm usually looking for {expecting}.  I think this was one of those times.  I've been praying about my housing situation.  Where to look for a new house.  When/how to list mine.  Whether or not to move at all.  Etc...  I didn't get a ton of clarity today, but I definitely got the message that I don't belong in the neighborhood I was looking at.


What do you think?  How does God speak to you?  Any suggestions for improving my listening techniques?

hmmm....

Maybe blogging just isn't my thing?  OR maybe I have TOO MANY things right now.  Whatever it is, I've been a horrible blogger recently.  I'm sorry.


Life is all topsy turvy right now.  I'm getting divorced.  It still seems taboo to say it or write it, but I need to get over it, because it's happening whether I like it or not.  {For the record, this was NOT my idea.}  I took the girls to Florida for spring break with a girlfriend and her kids, and Ryan stayed here and moved out of our house and into his condo while we were gone.  I knew months in advance that he was going to do this.  I talked to my friend during our drive home about what I was really going home to.  I thought I was prepared.  I thought I had worked through all of the feelings I had about that.  I was wrong.  I was so not prepared for the onslaught of emotion that hit me as soon as I saw the half empty closet in my room.  I'm sure that driving all day and getting home at 4:30am and then getting up for breakfast at 9:30am may have left me a bit more on edge than I would normally be, but I was a WRECK that day.   I managed my way thru it and the next few days, but I was in a serious fog.  That is not a good way to live.  Especially not when you have 2 amazing and beautiful little girls that need you to be on your game.


Just about 2 weeks have gone by now and I FINALLY feel like I'm getting back to myself.  A week full of busy kids schedules - dance, gymnastics, soccer, etc. - combined with getting ready for a garage sale, shopping for a new house, designing shower invitations, reconfiguring a home network, and more will do that for you.  It simply doesn't leave a lot of room for loafing around!


Now it's Friday afternoon and I'm beat.  Emotionally and physically.  I feel as though I've been climbing a mountain and now I've simply run out of steam....  It's the first night that my girls are spending with their dad at his house.  I was not prepared for how much it would hurt to see them go.  Feeling this reminds me of one of my favorite verses from the bible:  "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." - Philippians 4:13, and also one of my favorite songs - Matthew West's "Strong Enough".


I'll get through this just like everything else.  I keep praying and I know God is with me.  Sometimes it just helps to clear your head a little and write down what you're thinking and feeling, you know?


Anyway... I will try not to use this blog to ramble on and on about divorce, or rather to air my dirty laundry and complain or whine.  I may, however, use it from time to time to simply get down my thoughts and feelings and seek some outside advice.  For now though, it's time for me to go print some shower invitations and then get ready for a birthday party and bunko night.  Should be fun!

40 bags in 40 days update

 My list is complete!  Can not wait to get started!  Email me or leave me a comment if you would like a copy of my list template.   Here is a blank version of my list to print and fill in so you can join in the journey!

40 bags in 40 days

So tomorrow is Ash Wednesday and the start of Lent. 

Growing up Catholic, we always "gave something up" for Lent and didn't eat meat on Ash Wednesday or Friday's.  Giving something up with representative of the fasting that Jesus did, and I *think* that the meat thing was supposed to be too, but no one ever had a really good explanation of that one.  I've since learned that it was actually created by the collusion of the Catholic church and the fishing industry to promote eating fish instead of other meat during Lent. Whatever.

For a long time I've rebelled against that Catholic upbringing and haven't done anything special for Lent.  Although it hasn't been without a good measure of good 'ole Catholic guilt every time I eat a steak on a Friday during Lent or turn down an invitation to yet another fish fry.

I am feeling compelled to do something this year.  Something to re-focus me.  Something to simplify my life.  Something that connects me with Jesus, not just something that my church says I should do.

Enter "40 bags in 40 days"

I first learned about this concept here on this blog that I follow.  I was initially intrigued be the concept of organized cleaning (I always need a little help with that) but the more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a good idea for so many more reasons.  Here's the link to the original inspiration "pin" too.

So I am going to start working on my list right now and will start collecting bags tomorrow.  I would LOVE to have some people join me in the process.  I know I'm a little late to the table (what's new?!) in asking people to join me on this journey, but I'm pretty sure that you could easily get caught up if you start some time this week.  

Let's do this!  Are you in?!